Seoul - Part 3

Before I go on, I would like to make note of a recent realization concerning a tendency of mine to generalize and oversimplify the Korean people and society – so please take my comments with a grain of salt. It is far easier to generalize a nationality than lets say a race or a religious group (less controversial I suppose) but either way, such views should only come to fruition through self exploration and observation and should always remain malleable. My experiences tell me that, in general, black people are good at basketball, white people are relatively terrible dancers, Russians can drink me under the table, Chinese are frugal, and Icelandic folk are jovial. The problem with stereotypes is that one, words can influence others perceptions (even if they have never met someone from Iceland), two, you can’t classify individuals when everyone is a unique being, and three, stereotyping people often is a derivative of hate and misunderstanding which can result in fear, conflict, and calamity. I don’t discriminate. I am open to “all of gods children”, but at the same time you won’t find me walking through West Philadelphia after hours, taking drinking bets with an Irishman, or trying to talk about sex with a Chinese colleague (not again that is). So like I said, my perceptions of groups and individuals have more to do with me than them – and I’m always changing.

Friday

For lunch we took the subway to Apugujeong where we found an underground restaurant serving stir-fry squid with rice – squid is a staple Korean food. Apgujeong is a very trendy area just south of the river and is often referred to as the Beverly Hills of Seoul. Luxury retail stores are omnipresent, everything is valet, beautiful girls with large sunglasses and designer bags meander the streets and shopping malls, and one hip neighborhood even has a huge “Rodeo” sign hanging over the entrance.

Although this area is known for housing the rich and fabulous, I found that many Koreans throughout Seoul love luxury brands eg. Gucci, Louis Vuitton, Prada, what-have-you. And although there are many with a unique sense of fashion, most Koreans are slaves to the current trend. In such a homogenous society, a new type of cell phone or a new look or a new method of dieting can become a sensation over night. This need to conform in fear of being judged poorly by your peers is something every high school kid goes through, but when a whole society condones this mindset, there are extreme repercussions. For example, Korea has more cosmetic surgeons per capita than any other country in the world. This obsession with image, although present in the US, is socially embraced by the Korean community. I don’t think I have ever gone to dinner with a group of Koreans without receiving a comment about my weight (gain or loss) or my skin (good or bad). If you have a beard, like my friend, girls will not come up to you, not just because they don’t like the look and feel of beards (soft Korean skin is easy to rash) but because they don’t understand why a guy would have a beard knowing that most Korean girls dislike them – your personality is clearly flawed for not trying to be normal. In a city where wealth and beauty are so highly valued (more so than in most parts of the world), I assume many people have a rough time (just like in high school). Personally, I despise shallow people that are quick to judge and although this superficial vib is very much part of our culture (especially in LA), I find it exceptionally rooted in Korean society. That being said, Korean people are very attractive and the girls are remarkably refined – it is absurd how many drop-dead gorgeous women are in Seoul.

Anyway…after people watching for an hour while drinking my 6 dollar coffee, my girlfriend brought me to her old neighborhood near Sadong. Like any other area surrounding a metro station, there was plenty to see and plenty to do. The street food vendors are a favorite of mine. Although they could easily pack up and leave, many of these small booths of steaming Korean smells seemed to be permanently in place – in Beijing, police drive-bys keep vendors on the run in the busier sections of the city. Another interesting observation to point out was how there were copious amount of “Love Motels” throughout Seoul’s commercial areas. These “Love Motels” are fundamentally hotels for lovers that only want to stay for a few hours. This may sound dirty to us, but it is very natural (and clean) in Seoul to use there accommodations from time to time. University students mostly live at home while many don’t move out until they get married. Once married, many parents move back in with their children as a trade off for taking care of them for 30 something years. In Seoul, there is essentially a major lack of privacy.

Korean culture unquestionably is centered around the family, particularly the father. His word is often final and his financial support is what keeps many Koreans afloat during their twenties. This Confucian sense of obligation to fully respect your father, known as filial piety, reverberates into all aspects of society. Elders are highly revered and to disagree with them would be a sign of disrespect. In every situation you should be aware of those senior to you because this will not only drastically change the way you speak and address them (to be safe you can always say “yo” at the end of your Korean phrases) but also it changes who’s hand to shake first, who’s glass to pour first, how often you need to bow, etc. For example, many young Koreans are afraid to smoke cigarettes on the streets because they are afraid of upsetting the “elders”. Clearly, this social dynamic has its pros – honor, respect, obedience and naturally a strong sense of responsibility and self-worth in the context of family and community. However, I also think this type of hierarchy limits progressive thought and creates an alienating environment for outsiders who apparently don’t have Korean parents, and therefore “can never fully understand Korean society”. And there is nothing scarier than a proud Korean defending his family’s honor or an infuriated elder who doesn’t think you’ve shown him enough respect – so by all means, when you go to Korea, ask your Korean friends some cultural (safety) tips.

For dinner, my girlfriend and I met up with an old friend who had studied in Beijing and was now working in a computer graphics company. I was craving Korean BBQ and so we picked one of the many places that covered the infamous neighborhood of Gangnam. In the views of my girlfriend and all of her friends, this area was the nexus of Seoul nightlife. We are talking about an endless network of bars and restaurants and clubs in all directions being fed on by mobs of fashionable Koreans. Gangnam and other nightlife venues are obviously popular during the weekends but because of the ritual of getting hammered after work, many businessmen can be seen out Mon-Thurs while weekends are reserved for “family time.” At dinner, as we cooked and ate strips of roasted beef that melted in my mouth, we discussed the impact of a trade agreement that the newly appointed president Lee MB had just signed with the Americans – a free trade agreement permitting US beef imports. While the president knew that this would lower the price thus making beef more affordable for lower income families, I don’t think he was prepared for the current outcry. Koreans, not just disgruntled farmers, are fervently protesting against US beef imports, accusing the meat of still having Mad Cow disease and therefore a major threat to the health and stability of Korea. Online blogs and text messages (very similar to the methods used in China to boycott Carrefour) have spearheaded a xenophobic campaign that has incited scores of nationalistic university students demanding a ban on US beef and expressing hatred for the “American devils.” Lee MB’s approval rating has dropped below 30% and further unrest seems inevitable.

What fascinates me most about Korea concerning trade is its ability to be protectionist of its industries even when the invisible hand of Adam Smith is at work. For much of Korea’s development, the government did a great job of protecting its automobile and electronic industries from powerhouses in America, Japan, and Europe. Only recently has the international community and the WTO been able to make some headway on the free trade front. However, nationalistic pride in home grown companies and products (like those of Hyundai, Daewoo, Samsung, LG, SK) have helped propel these companies in becoming international brands. Ask yourself – why do so many Americans use LG phones and drive a Hyundai these days? Despite the fact that the CEOs of all of these Korean conglomerates have seen the inside of a jail cell on corruption charges, these companies are doing remarkably well and that says a lot about Korea’s strong product nationalism – which is the current trend for now.

After dinner, we relocated to a relaxing bar situated on the top floor of a nearby office building – the views of Gangnam were spectacular. To my delight, after meeting up with another Beijing pengyou (friend), we made our way to a traditional Korean hop (bar). The place reeked of kimchi and soju and that was exactly what I wanted. Korean bars are very anti-social compared to their Western counterparts. Everybody sits at tables and there is no intermingling outside the party you arrived with - so much for pick up lines. After brushing up on my Korean drinking etiquette, we continued the bar crawl to a place called Andersons where a group of native English speakers (teachers) awaited us – we had met a few of these characters during a visit to Beijing a few months ago. This American bar had good music, good darts, and cheap beer (Hite and Cass are the staple Korean brews). As 3 pm approached we decided it was time to hit up a club called MB right next a club called Harlem. It was raucous, it was sweaty, it was chaotic, it was a club - I’ll leave it at that.

Generally speaking, the rising sun is a sign that you’ve been out to late and that you should go straight to bed. After returning to my friend’s apartment, the two of us decided it would be fun to walk to the river and watch Seoul awaken. In the state I was in, this walk seemed like an expedition but it was well worth to see the mist rising from the river water. And although I was intoxicated and high on life, at that moment, lying in the grass watching the sun appear from behind the mighty Han River, I decided that despite the inherent challenges and cultural clashes one may experience while living in Seoul, this city had an allure very different than that in New York, Hong Kong, or Beijing but very profound and captivating nonetheless. Perhaps it’s something they put in the water…it’s probably soju.